Tips to make an intimate wedding Guest List: How to Keep It Intimate and Exclusive

Ah, the wedding guest list – that tricky puzzle every couple faces when planning their wedding. It’s like trying to fit your entire life into a tiny home: you want it to be intimate, yet not leave out anyone important. So, how do you curate an intimate wedding guest list that feels like a cozy gathering rather than a concert or festival cramming people in?

Cutting down a guest list often means making hard decisions. It’s not about being ruthless; it’s about creating the atmosphere you want. A smaller list means more quality time with each guest or being able to host your event in the setting you’ve dreamed of, and honestly, isn’t that what we all want?

First things first, jot down your non-negotiables. These are your VIPs – the people you can’t imagine saying “I do” without. This list usually includes immediate family and your ride-or-die friends.

Be open and honest with your guests about your desire for an intimate wedding. Most people will understand and respect your decision. However, be prepared for some pushback, especially from family. It’s okay to explain your vision for an intimate wedding and gently stand your ground. Once you’ve set your rules (no kids, no distant relatives, etc.), stick to them. Consistency prevents hurt feelings and makes your decisions easier to explain.

If needed, create a B-list, so if you get declines from your A-list, you can invite others without feeling like you’re overstuffing your venue. Just be mindful of sending these invites out with enough notice!

Where we’ve noticed most couples tend to get in trouble when creating their intimate wedding guest list is with plus ones. At V&V, we tell our couples to use this simple rule when considering inviting plus ones: if you haven’t met them, or if they haven’t been dating your guest for a significant amount of time, it’s okay to skip the invite. This isn’t a networking event; it’s your wedding!

At V&V we believe every couple should have the right tools to make their wedding planning journey as easy and smooth as possible, with that in mind we offer our planning platform for all of our packages with access to guest tracking and guest seating tool with an easily manageable floor plan. The wedding guest seating tool counts with a drag-and-drop feature you can assign your guests to tables and if you or they change their mind you can easily move them to another table or just unassign them for tables. Learn more about our planning platform here. 

Navigating the guest list can be a bit of a tightrope walk, but remember, it’s your day, your rules. Still not sure how to handle your intimate wedding guest list – or have an overbearing family member who just doesn’t understand? We get it – we see this happen during almost every planning process and would love to guide you through. 

Connect with us and see how we can relieve your guest list headache.

Professional partners:

Venue: @1757golfclub 

Photo & Video: @ponce_photoandfilms

Wedding Coordinator: @vvweddingplanning

 Hair: @CherylChristineHairDesign

 Makeup: @makeupbykileysmith

 Caterer: @1757golfclub

 Band: @watershedentertainment

 Officiant: @rlioz

If you’d like us to help you plan your next event or wedding…

If you are ready to plan your Stone Tower Winery wedding, we’d love to hear from you. Send us a message on our contact page or send us an email at hola@VVweddingplanning.com! We can’t wait to hear about your wedding! 🤗💕

Send us a message on our contact page or send us an email at hola@VVweddingplanning.com!

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Check more of more wedding tips in our Weddings Planning tips tag.